CrankyBuddhist   the learning never ends …

Sometimes.

It is really difficult to trust that everything is going to be ok, when everything on the surface is just so … cockeyed.

I was turned down for a job yesterday. Not an unusual event. It was one of those jobs that would have been equally good or bad to get. Good, because it would have stabalized my life and gotten me into a place and I would have been able to stop hustling for jobs and let my personal projects slow down a bit. Bad because it would have tied me to one place and I would have been dependent on the job for a place to live and I wouldn’t have been able to travel.

Not that I can travel now anyway.

In any case, I have to wonder what The Universe is thinking. It just seems like I have a lot of weird job karma, or supporting myself karma. Sometimes it’s just hard to trust that there is something around this blind corner. Something good. It’s like a freaking cosmic scavenger hunt.

And I thought they were so much fun when I was a kid.

There are times in my life when I just have no clue as to how something is going to happen. When I was younger, franticness would seep into my life and the more frantic I became, the more chaotic my life would be and what I needed would get lost before it arrived. I find that now it seems I’ve arrived at the point in my life where I’m not so frantic and the choas is not so extreme. I’ve begun to heed my own advice and have trust in The Universe. The Universe always responds to the things we need, and all we need is a calm and pleasant space to receive it.